I know it has been over a year since I posted anything here. Get over it. That's how I roll.
After over two years as a chaplain, I have been absolutely amazed at how God gives people experiences to shape them and stretch them. I can definately say that about myself. I look back at the journey I have already made and am amazed at how much I have been pushed, pulled, stretched, refined, tried, tested, humbled and sustained. But it is not just me. I see it in the lives of those I am helping as a chaplain. I'm not saying they are always miraculously healed, but it is amazing to see how the Lord is working in their lives, just as he is in mine.
When I was a new chaplain, I had a young man come see me who was depressed. He wasn't really religious and he didn't really want to talk religion. He wasn't really willing to open up much about what was really going on with him, so I just let him talk, gave him a little advice, then asked if he wanted me to pray with him or give him a special blessing. After I explained to him what that was, he surprised me by requesting a blessing. So I placed my hands on his head and blessed him according to my faith tradition. When I was done he was holding his hand over his heart and he said, "Hot damn, chaplain! That was amazing." He said it made him feel good, but again he didn't talk about it much and left.
He came back into my office a few months later and said, "Chaplain, what did you do to me? I can't enjoy myself anymore." He went on to explain how, though he was feeling much less depressed, ever since he received that blessing he had not had the same desire for nor enjoyment from the things he had been participating in. He then went on to tell me all about his selfish, immoral party lifestyle. I could tell that he was beginning to feel the Spirit in his life, and that the Spirit was pushing out those things that were not good for him. Over the next several months he began to transform as he stopped fighting the spiritual feelings he was having. I invite him to pray, and he came back and told me of a struggle he had one night in prayer when it felt like something dark and horrible was being ripped out of him. He said it was an awful experience that he felt like a completely different clean person afterward. He then started attending my Bible study class and would occassionally come back with some insight he had gained from the spirit on something in his life that needed to change. He decided to quit drinking and having casual sex. Occasionally he would stop by my office to get extra strength when he was going on a vacation with friends who would be doing that stuff. I often expected him to come back with bad news, but he never did. The last time he came into my office he told me of a trip he took to Miami with some friends. He said they went out to party, and he had no desire to go into that kind of atmosphere, so he went for a walk on the beach to think and pray. As he was walking he looked down and saw a seashell that was deteriorating and deformed. He had the feeling that that was what his soul had looked like. He kept walking and praying and as he did the seashells he would find were in better and better condition. As he sat there in my office telling me the story he reached into his pocket and pulled out a handful of perfect white seashells and said, "Chaplain, this is what God is helping me become."
The last time I saw him he had been clean of alcohol and illicit sex for over a year and was still working at improving his life and his walk with God. There are so many stories like this and I feel very privileged to be a part of them.
I have come to believe that God doesn't use the same standard for measuring righteousness that we do. We think that righteousness is about being perfect...or at least as close to it as we can. Things likegoing to church, keeping the commandments, being involved in organizations and groups at church, visiting the poor, being on the PTA, baking all your from scratch, and raising perfectly obedient children seem to us like evidence that we must be doing pretty good. But I deal with people who seem to have everything stacked against them. Perhaps they grew up in an abusive home, or a home where Dad was a preacher who appeared to everyone else to be perfect, but at home cheated on his wife and neglected his kids. Or another person who goes through life and seems to lose everyone who they love through adoption, death, divorce, or freak occurances. To such people it can be really hard to believe in God, especially if they were never taught how to embrace spirituality from the beginning. And then you have mental illness. We know how severe mental illness can make people do crazy things, but what if it is more common that we realize to have just enough mental instability that it makes it hard to make good decisions. Or maybe we all go through times in our lives when, because of chemical changes in our brain, we are driven to behave in ways that we normally wouldn't. Look at how much adolesence changes us, for example. I believe that this is one of the reasons it is so important to understand the fall of Adam in order to understand the sacrifice of Christ. We all live in a fallen world and it affects us all in different ways. That is why we cannot judge. We don't know the burdens people have been given to carry as we climb the mountain of life. Some people may climb up the mountain as if it presented no challenge at all. The may pass others who are struggling to make any progress and assume that they are doing better than others. Those who seem to make little or no progress often get discouraged and assume that they aren't cut out for heaven. Fortunately, that is not how God judges.
I think that one of the most important stories in the Bible is often misunderstood. When we read the story of the widow's mite, we often assume Christ is talking about tithing or giving to charity. But I think that it is really teaching us about the way the Father judges our good works. For some people living a life of discipleship comes easy. They, like the rich men in the story are able to poor buckets of good works into the pot. But for some it is not so easy. For some their offer may seem to be insignificant, but God knows that it is worth more than the others. It is not about how much we give compared to others, it is about the nature of our offering. It is about the sacrifice.
That is one of the great things about my job. I see God make bad men good, and good men better. Regardless of what their offering is, He multiplies it.
Okay, sorry for the sermon...but what did you expect? I'm a chaplain.
More stories to come.
(Sure, thats what I always say...I'll finish later).
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Sunday, October 4, 2009
JTF GTMO
I had the opportunity to visit Guantanamo Bay, Cuba during September. Naval Hospital Jacksonville, where I work supplies up to 75% of the medical personnel who take care of the detainees. They are pulled from our hospital on 6 month deployments to GTMO to be part of the joint medical group. The commanding officer of the hospital tries to visit once during each group's time there. This time he invited me to go along so I would have a better understanding of what our people go through there. So I joined the CO, XO, CMC, and a couple others as we visited GTMO. What I experienced was quite a spectacle. I don't think I can really describe it. It was fascinating and infuriating at the same time. I will do my best to try to convey what I saw and participated in.
Very little of what I saw was confidential. One of the main goals of the Joint detention group there is to make what they do transparent. They have been accused of all sorts of bad things by the media, and many of the people of the nation, who see lots of TV dramas about big cover-ups and scandals are quick to believe that the military is running some sort of secret torture camps. The truth is that the media is welcome to come visit (and many do) to see conditions for themselves. The guards and staff document everything they do (to the point that it is ridiculous) because the detainees will claim abuse over everything. I was absolutely shocked at how open they were about everything that goes on there. It was nothing like the impression I had from the media before my visit. The reporters will visit and be very impressed with conditions in the camps, then go home and write some garbage about GTMO being a scandal in some way because saying that everything is great isn't what grabs attention. Its all about the money.
The island is kind of ugly. It is a desert island with rolling hills, low shrubs and an occasional cactus. It is surrounded by beautiful blue ocean. There are huge iguanas and banana rats everywhere (a banana rat is comparable to the ROUS from Princess Bride). The base is quite impressive with state of the art facilities. There is actually quite a lot to do there. They have golf, Frisbee golf, free outdoor movies, scuba, paintball, etc. It is not at all a bad place to be. Unless you are attached to the detention camps.
When we first arrived we were given a brief, outlining the things we were going to see and telling us a little about the detainees. Mounted on the wall next to me was a display of all the makeshift weapons that had been confiscated from the detainees. It was quite an intimidating assortment of shanks and clubs. Contrary to popular belief, the detainees in GTMO were not just people who looked like they might be enemies who were rounded up after a gunfight. These are the leaders and those who killed innocent people. Many of them are very educated and persuasive in getting people to follow them. There were about 230 when I visited (that is the same number the media is reporting).
The image I had in my mind of how the detainees were treated came from a picture that was passed around the media of detainees kneeling with their hands tied behind their backs and with a bag over their head. It didn't look very humane. I assumed that the detainees were isolated from each other and treated much like that photo whenever they were moved. I couldn't have been further from the truth. (I now understand the reason the detainees in that photo were treated like that--I wil explain later). To my amazement (and honestly a little to my disgust) the detainees are treated almost like kings. It was very much like a prison you would see in the US, except that the detainees were treated much better, but got away with stuff that US prisoners could never get away with. They are given about 20 hours a day of "recreational time" where they can leave their cells and do pretty much whatever they want inside the compound. They have bigscreen TV's with arabic television (including al jazera I believe) and about any other channel they want (If they need a different channel they just tell their lawyers they are being mistreated and deprived. The lawyers then threaten to make a big scandal out of it. Then an article is published somewhere about how the detainees are being treated like animals. Then the politicians come to the military and treat them like they are the problem). They actually get to Skype their families back in Iraq or afganistan. I assume this means that the US has gone to the homes of the terrorists and set up high speed internet for them.
As you may have guessed because of the level of freedom given to the detainees, Al Qaeda is alive and well within the camps. They have a clear structure and have a system for sending messages from one camp to another.
More to come when I have more time....
Very little of what I saw was confidential. One of the main goals of the Joint detention group there is to make what they do transparent. They have been accused of all sorts of bad things by the media, and many of the people of the nation, who see lots of TV dramas about big cover-ups and scandals are quick to believe that the military is running some sort of secret torture camps. The truth is that the media is welcome to come visit (and many do) to see conditions for themselves. The guards and staff document everything they do (to the point that it is ridiculous) because the detainees will claim abuse over everything. I was absolutely shocked at how open they were about everything that goes on there. It was nothing like the impression I had from the media before my visit. The reporters will visit and be very impressed with conditions in the camps, then go home and write some garbage about GTMO being a scandal in some way because saying that everything is great isn't what grabs attention. Its all about the money.
The island is kind of ugly. It is a desert island with rolling hills, low shrubs and an occasional cactus. It is surrounded by beautiful blue ocean. There are huge iguanas and banana rats everywhere (a banana rat is comparable to the ROUS from Princess Bride). The base is quite impressive with state of the art facilities. There is actually quite a lot to do there. They have golf, Frisbee golf, free outdoor movies, scuba, paintball, etc. It is not at all a bad place to be. Unless you are attached to the detention camps.
When we first arrived we were given a brief, outlining the things we were going to see and telling us a little about the detainees. Mounted on the wall next to me was a display of all the makeshift weapons that had been confiscated from the detainees. It was quite an intimidating assortment of shanks and clubs. Contrary to popular belief, the detainees in GTMO were not just people who looked like they might be enemies who were rounded up after a gunfight. These are the leaders and those who killed innocent people. Many of them are very educated and persuasive in getting people to follow them. There were about 230 when I visited (that is the same number the media is reporting).
The image I had in my mind of how the detainees were treated came from a picture that was passed around the media of detainees kneeling with their hands tied behind their backs and with a bag over their head. It didn't look very humane. I assumed that the detainees were isolated from each other and treated much like that photo whenever they were moved. I couldn't have been further from the truth. (I now understand the reason the detainees in that photo were treated like that--I wil explain later). To my amazement (and honestly a little to my disgust) the detainees are treated almost like kings. It was very much like a prison you would see in the US, except that the detainees were treated much better, but got away with stuff that US prisoners could never get away with. They are given about 20 hours a day of "recreational time" where they can leave their cells and do pretty much whatever they want inside the compound. They have bigscreen TV's with arabic television (including al jazera I believe) and about any other channel they want (If they need a different channel they just tell their lawyers they are being mistreated and deprived. The lawyers then threaten to make a big scandal out of it. Then an article is published somewhere about how the detainees are being treated like animals. Then the politicians come to the military and treat them like they are the problem). They actually get to Skype their families back in Iraq or afganistan. I assume this means that the US has gone to the homes of the terrorists and set up high speed internet for them.
As you may have guessed because of the level of freedom given to the detainees, Al Qaeda is alive and well within the camps. They have a clear structure and have a system for sending messages from one camp to another.
More to come when I have more time....
Sunday, March 1, 2009
A typical week
So you wonder what I do as a chaplain at a hospital. Sometimes I do too. But, just so the two people who read this post can see what I do, I will give you a basic list of some of the things that I might deal with. This post is not based on any actually week. I have to be careful because of confidentiality to make sure nobody could identify anyone from this blog. So this will be a random sample of experiences I have had since I arrived that, when put together, represent a typical week for me. I will do it based on my schedule.
Monday, 5am- wake up, eat a banana, get ready, and start riding. I ride my bike into work a couple of days a week. It is about 15 miles one way through a paved trail that goes through woods, around ponds, over a bridge for the first half, then on a typical city street for the second half. It takes me about an hour. If I get there in time, I may stop by the base gym and lift weights. I shower and get in my uniform at the hospital.
7am- Pre-surgery visits. At about 7am I go visit the patients who are preparing to go into surgery. This may range anywhere from tonsils to cancer related surgery. Some people have been waiting and looking forward to it for a long time. Others may be dreading it. I never know what kind of reaction I will get when I enter the rooms. I usually tell them that I am a chaplain just stopping by to see if there is anything I can do for them. I try to talk to them a little to find out about the surgery and how they feel about it. After I make sure they understand what a chaplain does I ask again if they would like my help with anything. Often they ask me to pray with them. I usually like to ask them if there is anything they would like me to pray for besides that the surger will go well. Sometimes they will talk to me about various other issues that they are worried about in their life. One time, for example, when I introduced myself the lady seemed fine but asked for prayer. When I asked what to pray for she began to cry and told me that her mother had passed away a year previous and that she was having a hard time adjusting. As we talked it became clear that she thought that if she really had faith then she wouldn't be sad. Her attempts to stifle her mourning were actually prolonging the process. I shared with her the story of Lazarus and how Jesus wept even though he knew perfectly that he would see him in a matter of minutes. When I prayed with her I asked God to help her feel good about mourning and let her know that it was okay to miss her mother. When I pray with people, I ask about their religious background. If they are Christian, I will pray in Jesus' name. If not I close with a more generic ending.
8am-SARP meeting- The chaplains also work with the substance abuse recovery program. For 4 weeks various personnel associated with the military who have addiction problems come the try to overcome their addictions. Some have been sent by court order or by their command because of DUI or because they tested positive on a drug test. Some will be discharged from the military (in the Navy it is automatic for drug use). Many of them are using to distract them from pain and stress in their life. Most of them have caused pain and stress because of using. That is where we come in as chaplains. At this meeting, the counselors report on each of the patients in their group. Occasionally, there will be somebody who needs to see the chaplain. For example, on one occasion I was called in to talk to a patient who said they really needed to talk. He was a marine who, while he was in Irag, had shot an insurgent, but had also inadvertantly killed a little girl who was behind the insurgent. He had PTSD from it, which was feeding his alcoholism, and was carrying some deep guilt issues. Much of what he needed was beyond my skills as a chaplain, but I was able to help with the spiritual and guilt issues. Another time I was called to counsel a young girl who had gone out and gotten drunk on the weekend during her treatment. That meant she was a treatment failure and would be discharged from the Navy. My job was to help give her hope and direction.
10am, Personal devotions- I usually take a little time to read scriptures, pray and maybe read an inspirational book. Then I check my email and take care of any stuff associated with that.
11am, Patient visits- There are two chaplains at the hospital, so we divide up the patients to visit. One week I will take those in inpatient care, and he will take the ICU and the maternal and Infant Unit. This is usually the most rewarding, and the most difficult part of my job. There are a lot of people who really need spiritual help. Some want it, others don't. Sometimes there are people whose lives and bodies are falling apart and they want some way out of it. It is really difficult sometimes to comfort them, even if they may not get better. I'll spread out some of my experiences over the 5 days of my week. I will write about this day as though I was assigned to ICU/MIU. In the ICU a met a young lady who had come in the hospital for an appendectomy. Her body had not reacted well and she ended up in ICU. She had already been there several days when I met her and she was not happy. She looked discouraged and depressed. I talked to her about her faith (she was christian), but it didn't seem to be helping her much. I asked if she would like me to pray with her and she said that would be fine. Then I explained that in my denomination we, like many others, have an ordinance of annointing the sick and giving them a blessing. I asked if she would rather I do that. She agreed. Following the blessing she was completely different. She smiled and seemed to be a lot happier. From that day on every time I would walk in the room she would just light up. On the day she left she asked for my card and said she couldn't thank me enough for helping her change her attitude so she could heal. After ICU I go up to see the new babies. Usually the people there are happy and don't ask for help as often. Usually I start talking to the mother and those present about the baby and just get them comfortable with me. I tell them about my kids and, if it is there first (it usually is) share with them some things to expect and advice that has helped me. Occasionally I will get to pray with them. One day I came in and found a young lady who didn't seem too happy. Her baby was born quite early and was in the NICU. She had also tested positive for meth, and was facing some difficult days ahead. We talked several times about what she needed to do to become the Mom she wanted to be. We prayed together and I got her to commit to several things. Then she left. I don't know what has happened to her and probably never will. But I still think of her and pray for her.
Lunch- Hospital cafeteria is the best meal you will find for $4.25.
After lunch is usually open for various things. Sometimes I will walk around the hospital to visit people and to be seen. Sometimes I will go down to the ER and visit staff and patients. Other times people stop by to talk.
Counseling- Any day, any time, people might stop by for counseling. Most of the counseling we do is related to relationships/marriage. Others come in who are dealing with grief or work related stress. Here's one example. A couple comes to visit me and the wife informs me that she needs help forgiving her husband because he cheated on her for 6 months while on deployment. She wants to stay with him, but is finding it really hard. So over the course of several weeks we worked on helping them through. After a while I strongly encouraged them to go to their pastor (since they were active in a church) for help since they needed to have local support. I haven't seen them since. I hope things have gone well.
Odds and ends- I also have other things I put together to help. We do a weekly message on our web page, and I am responsible for that. At some point during my day I work on that.
Home-15 miles, sometimes in the sticky heat, other times in pouring rain (dramatic, huh?)
Tuesday
5am- wake up, ride scooter to work
6am, command PT- Tuesday morning is optional for physical training. As a chaplain, however, we are taught to go where our command goes and get involved. And I like it. We usually do push-ups, sit-ups, etc. and about a two mile run. Then I shower at the hospital.
7:30, personal devotions
8am, Command Orientation- Every other week there is an orientation class for all the new people who come the the command. As part of that, the pastoral care department (that's the chaplains-almost always done by me) does a segment to introduce them to what we do. After I give them a quick run down on what we offer, then I do an hour-long brief (nice oxymoron) on suicide prevention. Usually in the military this type of thing is affectionately refered to as "death by powerpoint." I have change our program, and completely done away with teh powerpoint. I now do it as a discussion. So far it has generated a lot of positive feedback. Because people are no longer in a computer induced coma, they get a chance to know me. It has led to a lot of people coming to see me. I have on a couple of occasions been able to help prevent people from suicide because somebody heard something important in the class that led to them getting help, or helping somebody else.
9:30am, patient call- Occasionaly we will get called to visit patients outside of our normal rounds. This happens when a patient requests us or when the staff thinks it would be helpful. Most of these are associated with miscarriages. One time I was called up to the operating room for a lady who had just found that she had lost her baby after 8 weeks. She had been trying for a while and this was her second loss in 6 months. She was catholic and wanted to make sure the baby was baptized. When I ask our Catholic priest to visit her he looked very uncomfortable. Because the baby had already died, there was nothing he could do and he knew it would be awkward talking to the mother. Fortunately, as a Mormon I believe that the baby didn't need baptism and that its salvation was secured through the atonement of Christ. So I went and visited with her. I prayed with her and promised her I would bless the baby. After her surgery was done I went in and said a prayer over the baby, then I was there with the mother when she woke up. Several weeks later she stopped by the office with some cookies and a card. She told me that she was so impressed and thankful for what I did for her that when they got to their new command (they were moving that week) they were going to donate money to our church.
10:00am, patient visits- Another experience I had in the ICU was with another chaplain's wife. She was there for some issues related to low blood pressure. Her husband, who served in his local baptist church as a chaplain who would visit the sick members of his congregation, told me that she had been struggling with this unknown problem for 2 years and that they had tried desperately to figure out what was wrong. She couldn't stand without fainting. I talked with them and read scriptures with them. Then finally they asked me to pray with them. I had the distinct impression to offer to give her a priesthood blessing...but I chickened out. I guess I assumed that these baptists wouldn't want some Mormon blessing. That weekend in Elder's quorum I taught a lesson about following the spirit I thought again about that situation and prayed that the next time that situation happened I would do the right thing. Well, the next day the same couple was in the hospital. When I offered they gladly accepted and I gave her a blessing. The next day she was gone. I saw them yesterday as I was leaving the hospital. She was in a wheel chair, but she told me that things have gotten much better for her. I was really grateful that God gave me an opportunity for a second chance. One day in the MIU I walked into the room of a mother and new baby that was packed with people. After I explained the the new mother what a chaplain did I asked if I could do anything for her (I made a paper that lists some of the things we offer), the baby's grandmother says, after looking at the paper, "Give her a blessing!" I found out that the family, though they claimed to be christian, had not been to church in years and knew very little about it. I explained to them what I was going to do and why. I ended up giving both the mother and the baby priesthood blessings. When I was finished there was not a dry eye in the room...not even the father or grandfather! Her teenage brother was weeping. I expressed to them God's love for them all and assured them that what they were feeling was the Spirit. I left their room thanking God that I had witnessed him working in the lives of people who had not felt close to Him for a long time, if ever.
11am, discharge planning- Boring meeting. We talk about the patients and make sure the people who are going home are prepared. One time I learned that there was this old man who was causing the staff a lot of problems. He was an alcoholic and 97 years old. The doctors and staff tried to help him and tell him he needed help, but he would yell at them and tell them to leave him alone. This always surprised me because he was always very nice to me. We had had several religious conversations, and he always told me how much he respected Mormons. I had never seen this side of him, but I told them I would do what I could. I went in and talked to him about the story of Christ washing His disciples feet. I told him that, like Peter, we often feel like we need to serve others and take care of ourselves. But in order to be cleansed by Christ we must let him wash us. I told him that God was trying to cleanse him through the help of others. I invited him listen to the doctors and nurses because they were trying to help him the way he needed. He promised he would.
12pm, Bible Study- I started a lunchtime bible study class that people could bring their lunch to and learn about the New Testament. It is a great class. We feel the spirit and learn from each other. One day I was teaching about how Christ turned water to wine, and we were discussing how He can take the mundane things in our life and make them sweet to us. I shared an experience about how I was getting frustrated with the kids and found myself avoiding them. After praying for help I came home one day and the kids were so excited to see me they all tackled me and played with me. I felt God change my heart. After class a couple of people came to me to thank me for that story because they had felt the same thing and the class had answered their prayers.
Code Blue- If there is ever a code blue called in the hospital, one of the chaplains is supposed to go to help comfort the family. Though there have been many called since I have been there, only a few have been serious. One time a code was called on a woman who was in labor and delivery. The anesthesia caused her to have some problems so she had to have and emergency c-section. I went up and stayed with the father while his wife was being operated on. I told him that I knew how he felt because I had been through a similar situation with our first child. I think it helped him to know that things weren't really as bad as it felt.
Counseling- Another experience I had in a counseling session was a young man who was stressed out because he was being deployed. After talking with him a while I could tell that he had some clinical depression. I suggested he go to mental health. We also talked about his spirituality and finding some direction in his life. He asked me to give him a blessing. After I was finished he said, "Hot Damn Chaplain! That was amazing!" I think I knew what he meant. He talked to me a couple of weeks ago. He is doing great!
4pm-home on my sweet scooter
Wednesday
5am, wake up, run 5k, get ready, ride scooter to work.
7am, presurgery visits- It is fairly common to meet mothers whose pregnancy has terminated in the first trimester and who are going in for surgery to remove the baby. It is a good opportunity to teach them because they often have a lot of questions about what will happen to the baby. As a chaplain, if they ask I can answer. I usually say something like, "I believe that..." or "In my faith tradition we teach that..." I have come to learn that as a Mormon chaplain, I am uniquely qualified to comfort those who lose babies. Our doctrine on this offers more joy and hope than any others I am aware of.
8am, morning devotions- Another thing I try to do as part of my devotions is to pray for people. In the hospital chapel is a little box where people can write prayer requests and leave them for the chaplain or priest. I like to go into the chapel and pray for these people. I also pray for patients. Sometimes they don't want me to pray with them, just for them.
9am- Humor/stress workshop- I am on the command stress control team. We teach people various ways to deal with stress. About 10% of our Hospital staff is deployed right now, but the hospital must go forward. That means added stress on everyone. So we teach some short lessons on how people can deal with that stress.
9:30 am Captains Mast- This is a disciplinary measure. Sailors who have gotten themselves into trouble and are going to be punished go to Captain's mast. They are presented before the Commanding Officer and the chain of command to receive their punishment. Usually they are there because of some alcohol related offense, but it could anything from sexual assault to chronic tardiness. Sometimes people are trying to get out of the military so they will do things on purpose. Most of the time, however, the people who are there are experiencing some sort of pain in their life and they don't know how to deal with it so it ends up causing them to make bad decisions and behave poorly. I stand in in case the CO needs my advice or opinion. Many times I have already talked with those who are in trouble. If not, I will approach them afterward to let them know I am here for them.
Patient Call- I once got a call from the ICU requesting my assistance. A young man on a ship had attempted to commit suicide by hanging himself. His life was saved by shipmates doing CPR. But he was basically a vegetable because his brain had gone so long without oxygen. I was called in because the family was arriving. The family was Catholic, which teaches that suicide is a mortal sin. Needless to say this was an awkward moment. Fortunately I don't necessarily share that view. Though we didn't talk about their son's eternal fate, I did pray with them. The also asked me to give him a blessing. As I blessed him I had the distinct impression that God was allowing him to remain in the situation he was in so that he could be healed spiritually. He remained in the ICU for several weeks, though his family was rarely there. I stopped and said hi and offered a silent prayer for him every chance I got.
12pm Jewish Study Group- We have put together a class that discusses various aspects of Judaism. Our Jewish lay leader is a psychologist who went to yashiva and actually worked as a chaplain in a hospital for a while. He does a great job leading a discussion on Judaism that it attended by more christians than Jews. He is also a really good friend of mine. The first day we met and he found out I was Mormon he said, "I'm obsessed with Mormons. I've never met a Mormon that had an ounce of anti-semitism in them. They all seem to have some sort of connection to Judaism." So we quickly became "brothers." Maybe some day I'll explain to him why it feels so much like we are brothers.
Lunch
Patient Visits- One week when I was visiting patients in the inpatient ward I met an man in his 90's and his wife. He had congestive heart failure and knew that it was only a matter of time. His wife was obviously having a difficult time as well. I visited them several times and prayed with them. The wife expressed her deep appreciation. After a couple of days he improved and was discharged. Several weeks later I received a call from the base chapel because I had been requested to officiate in the funeral for this man. It was a wonderful funeral and a wonderful opportunity for me. The family was very gracious. I hope that I was able to offer words of comfort in their time of need.
2pm- work on newspaper article.- The chaplains on the base take turns writing articles for the "chaplain's corner" in the base newspaper. It has to be motivational/inspirational stuff that is not specific to any religious denomination.
Counseling- Another common situation is helping sailors who are struggling with pornography addiction. This is especially difficult in the navy because there are many who don't see anything wrong with it and actually advertise it, and make fun of those who don't want to look. Those who come in for help usually do so because of a spouse or for religious reasons. The trick is to help them to be strong enough that they won't give in when they are deployed. I am trying to put together an addiction recovery program that will dovetail with the 12 step type programs and use the scriptures to teach important principles to help overcoming addiction.
I need to stop now because of time, but I will eventually finish this. I am just going to post it now on the off chance that anybody might read it. I hope I get to finish soon, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
Monday, 5am- wake up, eat a banana, get ready, and start riding. I ride my bike into work a couple of days a week. It is about 15 miles one way through a paved trail that goes through woods, around ponds, over a bridge for the first half, then on a typical city street for the second half. It takes me about an hour. If I get there in time, I may stop by the base gym and lift weights. I shower and get in my uniform at the hospital.
7am- Pre-surgery visits. At about 7am I go visit the patients who are preparing to go into surgery. This may range anywhere from tonsils to cancer related surgery. Some people have been waiting and looking forward to it for a long time. Others may be dreading it. I never know what kind of reaction I will get when I enter the rooms. I usually tell them that I am a chaplain just stopping by to see if there is anything I can do for them. I try to talk to them a little to find out about the surgery and how they feel about it. After I make sure they understand what a chaplain does I ask again if they would like my help with anything. Often they ask me to pray with them. I usually like to ask them if there is anything they would like me to pray for besides that the surger will go well. Sometimes they will talk to me about various other issues that they are worried about in their life. One time, for example, when I introduced myself the lady seemed fine but asked for prayer. When I asked what to pray for she began to cry and told me that her mother had passed away a year previous and that she was having a hard time adjusting. As we talked it became clear that she thought that if she really had faith then she wouldn't be sad. Her attempts to stifle her mourning were actually prolonging the process. I shared with her the story of Lazarus and how Jesus wept even though he knew perfectly that he would see him in a matter of minutes. When I prayed with her I asked God to help her feel good about mourning and let her know that it was okay to miss her mother. When I pray with people, I ask about their religious background. If they are Christian, I will pray in Jesus' name. If not I close with a more generic ending.
8am-SARP meeting- The chaplains also work with the substance abuse recovery program. For 4 weeks various personnel associated with the military who have addiction problems come the try to overcome their addictions. Some have been sent by court order or by their command because of DUI or because they tested positive on a drug test. Some will be discharged from the military (in the Navy it is automatic for drug use). Many of them are using to distract them from pain and stress in their life. Most of them have caused pain and stress because of using. That is where we come in as chaplains. At this meeting, the counselors report on each of the patients in their group. Occasionally, there will be somebody who needs to see the chaplain. For example, on one occasion I was called in to talk to a patient who said they really needed to talk. He was a marine who, while he was in Irag, had shot an insurgent, but had also inadvertantly killed a little girl who was behind the insurgent. He had PTSD from it, which was feeding his alcoholism, and was carrying some deep guilt issues. Much of what he needed was beyond my skills as a chaplain, but I was able to help with the spiritual and guilt issues. Another time I was called to counsel a young girl who had gone out and gotten drunk on the weekend during her treatment. That meant she was a treatment failure and would be discharged from the Navy. My job was to help give her hope and direction.
10am, Personal devotions- I usually take a little time to read scriptures, pray and maybe read an inspirational book. Then I check my email and take care of any stuff associated with that.
11am, Patient visits- There are two chaplains at the hospital, so we divide up the patients to visit. One week I will take those in inpatient care, and he will take the ICU and the maternal and Infant Unit. This is usually the most rewarding, and the most difficult part of my job. There are a lot of people who really need spiritual help. Some want it, others don't. Sometimes there are people whose lives and bodies are falling apart and they want some way out of it. It is really difficult sometimes to comfort them, even if they may not get better. I'll spread out some of my experiences over the 5 days of my week. I will write about this day as though I was assigned to ICU/MIU. In the ICU a met a young lady who had come in the hospital for an appendectomy. Her body had not reacted well and she ended up in ICU. She had already been there several days when I met her and she was not happy. She looked discouraged and depressed. I talked to her about her faith (she was christian), but it didn't seem to be helping her much. I asked if she would like me to pray with her and she said that would be fine. Then I explained that in my denomination we, like many others, have an ordinance of annointing the sick and giving them a blessing. I asked if she would rather I do that. She agreed. Following the blessing she was completely different. She smiled and seemed to be a lot happier. From that day on every time I would walk in the room she would just light up. On the day she left she asked for my card and said she couldn't thank me enough for helping her change her attitude so she could heal. After ICU I go up to see the new babies. Usually the people there are happy and don't ask for help as often. Usually I start talking to the mother and those present about the baby and just get them comfortable with me. I tell them about my kids and, if it is there first (it usually is) share with them some things to expect and advice that has helped me. Occasionally I will get to pray with them. One day I came in and found a young lady who didn't seem too happy. Her baby was born quite early and was in the NICU. She had also tested positive for meth, and was facing some difficult days ahead. We talked several times about what she needed to do to become the Mom she wanted to be. We prayed together and I got her to commit to several things. Then she left. I don't know what has happened to her and probably never will. But I still think of her and pray for her.
Lunch- Hospital cafeteria is the best meal you will find for $4.25.
After lunch is usually open for various things. Sometimes I will walk around the hospital to visit people and to be seen. Sometimes I will go down to the ER and visit staff and patients. Other times people stop by to talk.
Counseling- Any day, any time, people might stop by for counseling. Most of the counseling we do is related to relationships/marriage. Others come in who are dealing with grief or work related stress. Here's one example. A couple comes to visit me and the wife informs me that she needs help forgiving her husband because he cheated on her for 6 months while on deployment. She wants to stay with him, but is finding it really hard. So over the course of several weeks we worked on helping them through. After a while I strongly encouraged them to go to their pastor (since they were active in a church) for help since they needed to have local support. I haven't seen them since. I hope things have gone well.
Odds and ends- I also have other things I put together to help. We do a weekly message on our web page, and I am responsible for that. At some point during my day I work on that.
Home-15 miles, sometimes in the sticky heat, other times in pouring rain (dramatic, huh?)
Tuesday
5am- wake up, ride scooter to work
6am, command PT- Tuesday morning is optional for physical training. As a chaplain, however, we are taught to go where our command goes and get involved. And I like it. We usually do push-ups, sit-ups, etc. and about a two mile run. Then I shower at the hospital.
7:30, personal devotions
8am, Command Orientation- Every other week there is an orientation class for all the new people who come the the command. As part of that, the pastoral care department (that's the chaplains-almost always done by me) does a segment to introduce them to what we do. After I give them a quick run down on what we offer, then I do an hour-long brief (nice oxymoron) on suicide prevention. Usually in the military this type of thing is affectionately refered to as "death by powerpoint." I have change our program, and completely done away with teh powerpoint. I now do it as a discussion. So far it has generated a lot of positive feedback. Because people are no longer in a computer induced coma, they get a chance to know me. It has led to a lot of people coming to see me. I have on a couple of occasions been able to help prevent people from suicide because somebody heard something important in the class that led to them getting help, or helping somebody else.
9:30am, patient call- Occasionaly we will get called to visit patients outside of our normal rounds. This happens when a patient requests us or when the staff thinks it would be helpful. Most of these are associated with miscarriages. One time I was called up to the operating room for a lady who had just found that she had lost her baby after 8 weeks. She had been trying for a while and this was her second loss in 6 months. She was catholic and wanted to make sure the baby was baptized. When I ask our Catholic priest to visit her he looked very uncomfortable. Because the baby had already died, there was nothing he could do and he knew it would be awkward talking to the mother. Fortunately, as a Mormon I believe that the baby didn't need baptism and that its salvation was secured through the atonement of Christ. So I went and visited with her. I prayed with her and promised her I would bless the baby. After her surgery was done I went in and said a prayer over the baby, then I was there with the mother when she woke up. Several weeks later she stopped by the office with some cookies and a card. She told me that she was so impressed and thankful for what I did for her that when they got to their new command (they were moving that week) they were going to donate money to our church.
10:00am, patient visits- Another experience I had in the ICU was with another chaplain's wife. She was there for some issues related to low blood pressure. Her husband, who served in his local baptist church as a chaplain who would visit the sick members of his congregation, told me that she had been struggling with this unknown problem for 2 years and that they had tried desperately to figure out what was wrong. She couldn't stand without fainting. I talked with them and read scriptures with them. Then finally they asked me to pray with them. I had the distinct impression to offer to give her a priesthood blessing...but I chickened out. I guess I assumed that these baptists wouldn't want some Mormon blessing. That weekend in Elder's quorum I taught a lesson about following the spirit I thought again about that situation and prayed that the next time that situation happened I would do the right thing. Well, the next day the same couple was in the hospital. When I offered they gladly accepted and I gave her a blessing. The next day she was gone. I saw them yesterday as I was leaving the hospital. She was in a wheel chair, but she told me that things have gotten much better for her. I was really grateful that God gave me an opportunity for a second chance. One day in the MIU I walked into the room of a mother and new baby that was packed with people. After I explained the the new mother what a chaplain did I asked if I could do anything for her (I made a paper that lists some of the things we offer), the baby's grandmother says, after looking at the paper, "Give her a blessing!" I found out that the family, though they claimed to be christian, had not been to church in years and knew very little about it. I explained to them what I was going to do and why. I ended up giving both the mother and the baby priesthood blessings. When I was finished there was not a dry eye in the room...not even the father or grandfather! Her teenage brother was weeping. I expressed to them God's love for them all and assured them that what they were feeling was the Spirit. I left their room thanking God that I had witnessed him working in the lives of people who had not felt close to Him for a long time, if ever.
11am, discharge planning- Boring meeting. We talk about the patients and make sure the people who are going home are prepared. One time I learned that there was this old man who was causing the staff a lot of problems. He was an alcoholic and 97 years old. The doctors and staff tried to help him and tell him he needed help, but he would yell at them and tell them to leave him alone. This always surprised me because he was always very nice to me. We had had several religious conversations, and he always told me how much he respected Mormons. I had never seen this side of him, but I told them I would do what I could. I went in and talked to him about the story of Christ washing His disciples feet. I told him that, like Peter, we often feel like we need to serve others and take care of ourselves. But in order to be cleansed by Christ we must let him wash us. I told him that God was trying to cleanse him through the help of others. I invited him listen to the doctors and nurses because they were trying to help him the way he needed. He promised he would.
12pm, Bible Study- I started a lunchtime bible study class that people could bring their lunch to and learn about the New Testament. It is a great class. We feel the spirit and learn from each other. One day I was teaching about how Christ turned water to wine, and we were discussing how He can take the mundane things in our life and make them sweet to us. I shared an experience about how I was getting frustrated with the kids and found myself avoiding them. After praying for help I came home one day and the kids were so excited to see me they all tackled me and played with me. I felt God change my heart. After class a couple of people came to me to thank me for that story because they had felt the same thing and the class had answered their prayers.
Code Blue- If there is ever a code blue called in the hospital, one of the chaplains is supposed to go to help comfort the family. Though there have been many called since I have been there, only a few have been serious. One time a code was called on a woman who was in labor and delivery. The anesthesia caused her to have some problems so she had to have and emergency c-section. I went up and stayed with the father while his wife was being operated on. I told him that I knew how he felt because I had been through a similar situation with our first child. I think it helped him to know that things weren't really as bad as it felt.
Counseling- Another experience I had in a counseling session was a young man who was stressed out because he was being deployed. After talking with him a while I could tell that he had some clinical depression. I suggested he go to mental health. We also talked about his spirituality and finding some direction in his life. He asked me to give him a blessing. After I was finished he said, "Hot Damn Chaplain! That was amazing!" I think I knew what he meant. He talked to me a couple of weeks ago. He is doing great!
4pm-home on my sweet scooter
Wednesday
5am, wake up, run 5k, get ready, ride scooter to work.
7am, presurgery visits- It is fairly common to meet mothers whose pregnancy has terminated in the first trimester and who are going in for surgery to remove the baby. It is a good opportunity to teach them because they often have a lot of questions about what will happen to the baby. As a chaplain, if they ask I can answer. I usually say something like, "I believe that..." or "In my faith tradition we teach that..." I have come to learn that as a Mormon chaplain, I am uniquely qualified to comfort those who lose babies. Our doctrine on this offers more joy and hope than any others I am aware of.
8am, morning devotions- Another thing I try to do as part of my devotions is to pray for people. In the hospital chapel is a little box where people can write prayer requests and leave them for the chaplain or priest. I like to go into the chapel and pray for these people. I also pray for patients. Sometimes they don't want me to pray with them, just for them.
9am- Humor/stress workshop- I am on the command stress control team. We teach people various ways to deal with stress. About 10% of our Hospital staff is deployed right now, but the hospital must go forward. That means added stress on everyone. So we teach some short lessons on how people can deal with that stress.
9:30 am Captains Mast- This is a disciplinary measure. Sailors who have gotten themselves into trouble and are going to be punished go to Captain's mast. They are presented before the Commanding Officer and the chain of command to receive their punishment. Usually they are there because of some alcohol related offense, but it could anything from sexual assault to chronic tardiness. Sometimes people are trying to get out of the military so they will do things on purpose. Most of the time, however, the people who are there are experiencing some sort of pain in their life and they don't know how to deal with it so it ends up causing them to make bad decisions and behave poorly. I stand in in case the CO needs my advice or opinion. Many times I have already talked with those who are in trouble. If not, I will approach them afterward to let them know I am here for them.
Patient Call- I once got a call from the ICU requesting my assistance. A young man on a ship had attempted to commit suicide by hanging himself. His life was saved by shipmates doing CPR. But he was basically a vegetable because his brain had gone so long without oxygen. I was called in because the family was arriving. The family was Catholic, which teaches that suicide is a mortal sin. Needless to say this was an awkward moment. Fortunately I don't necessarily share that view. Though we didn't talk about their son's eternal fate, I did pray with them. The also asked me to give him a blessing. As I blessed him I had the distinct impression that God was allowing him to remain in the situation he was in so that he could be healed spiritually. He remained in the ICU for several weeks, though his family was rarely there. I stopped and said hi and offered a silent prayer for him every chance I got.
12pm Jewish Study Group- We have put together a class that discusses various aspects of Judaism. Our Jewish lay leader is a psychologist who went to yashiva and actually worked as a chaplain in a hospital for a while. He does a great job leading a discussion on Judaism that it attended by more christians than Jews. He is also a really good friend of mine. The first day we met and he found out I was Mormon he said, "I'm obsessed with Mormons. I've never met a Mormon that had an ounce of anti-semitism in them. They all seem to have some sort of connection to Judaism." So we quickly became "brothers." Maybe some day I'll explain to him why it feels so much like we are brothers.
Lunch
Patient Visits- One week when I was visiting patients in the inpatient ward I met an man in his 90's and his wife. He had congestive heart failure and knew that it was only a matter of time. His wife was obviously having a difficult time as well. I visited them several times and prayed with them. The wife expressed her deep appreciation. After a couple of days he improved and was discharged. Several weeks later I received a call from the base chapel because I had been requested to officiate in the funeral for this man. It was a wonderful funeral and a wonderful opportunity for me. The family was very gracious. I hope that I was able to offer words of comfort in their time of need.
2pm- work on newspaper article.- The chaplains on the base take turns writing articles for the "chaplain's corner" in the base newspaper. It has to be motivational/inspirational stuff that is not specific to any religious denomination.
Counseling- Another common situation is helping sailors who are struggling with pornography addiction. This is especially difficult in the navy because there are many who don't see anything wrong with it and actually advertise it, and make fun of those who don't want to look. Those who come in for help usually do so because of a spouse or for religious reasons. The trick is to help them to be strong enough that they won't give in when they are deployed. I am trying to put together an addiction recovery program that will dovetail with the 12 step type programs and use the scriptures to teach important principles to help overcoming addiction.
I need to stop now because of time, but I will eventually finish this. I am just going to post it now on the off chance that anybody might read it. I hope I get to finish soon, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Jacksonville FL
On the day of graduation from chaplain's school, I received a call from the chaplain detailer (the guy who decides where all the chaplains go). He gave me 3 choices since we couldn't go to Okinawa. 1) I could go to as small shipyard in portsmouth Maine and be the only chaplain on base. 2) I could be assigned to a base chapel at a marine air station in Beaufort SC. 3) Work at a hospital in Jacksonville Florida. I realize that the correct thing would have been to consult my wife first, but I felt like this was a no-brainer for what she would want. Maine was definately out of the question because Katie is cold-blooded. The marine base would have been a good choice for me, but I knew Katie would love Florida because of the warm weather and Disney World. So I told him right then that we wanted Florida.
I flew home the next day and we began frantically trying to get ready for the move. We had a week to get to Florida. We actually had to leave before the movers came. The trip was long, but the children were unbelievably good. . .thank goodness for DVD players. We drove into Jacksonville hours after hurricane/tropical storm Fay had passed. Despite the heavy rain and the fallen tree branches everywhere, Jacksonville was beautiful. I checked in the next day, then we went to the beach. Eventually we found a perfect house in a cul de sac with a million children, close to a really good school, and in a wonderful ward.
Since we only had one car, I needed to find a way for transportation to the base (about 15 miles from our house). I really didn't want to buy a new car (gas at the time was over $4), but there were no buses. So I bought a bike and started riding in every day. It is about an hour each way, but with traffic it is not really all that different from driving. It also gives me a chance to wake up in the morning, and to clear my head and leave work behind on the way home. It has helped me get into better shape too.
We love it here. We have season passes to disney world, and go as often as we can. We go to the beach quite often as well. Katie has lots of friends and we have get togethers with other families often. On New Years eve we had a neighborhood party (the temperature was in the 60's at midnight) with a million kids running around. It reminded me of the good old days in our neighborhood. We didn't square dance here, though. Maybe I'll suggest it for next year.
I flew home the next day and we began frantically trying to get ready for the move. We had a week to get to Florida. We actually had to leave before the movers came. The trip was long, but the children were unbelievably good. . .thank goodness for DVD players. We drove into Jacksonville hours after hurricane/tropical storm Fay had passed. Despite the heavy rain and the fallen tree branches everywhere, Jacksonville was beautiful. I checked in the next day, then we went to the beach. Eventually we found a perfect house in a cul de sac with a million children, close to a really good school, and in a wonderful ward.
Since we only had one car, I needed to find a way for transportation to the base (about 15 miles from our house). I really didn't want to buy a new car (gas at the time was over $4), but there were no buses. So I bought a bike and started riding in every day. It is about an hour each way, but with traffic it is not really all that different from driving. It also gives me a chance to wake up in the morning, and to clear my head and leave work behind on the way home. It has helped me get into better shape too.
We love it here. We have season passes to disney world, and go as often as we can. We go to the beach quite often as well. Katie has lots of friends and we have get togethers with other families often. On New Years eve we had a neighborhood party (the temperature was in the 60's at midnight) with a million kids running around. It reminded me of the good old days in our neighborhood. We didn't square dance here, though. Maybe I'll suggest it for next year.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Naval Chaplain School
After ODS, chaplain school seemed like a walk in the park. I moved into a hotel room that I shared with no one. I could sleep in til 6am and come and go from base whenever I wanted. It was really nice. It made staying awake in class a lot easier. We mostly did our PT on our own. I played basketball a little (we weren't allowed in ODS) and even got to play some racquetball.
During ODS we were mixed with doctors, lawyers, etc. But during chaplain school it was only chaplains. We had all different religious represented. There were two rabbis, a horde of evangelicals, Presbyterians, Lutherans, Anglicans, Nazarene, Pentecostals, Catholics, etc. It was great to get to mix with all of them. Every morning we had a little devotional. We were assigned days to be in charge of the devotional. Protestants did their own devotional. Catholics had theirs as well as the Jews. We were welcome to visit any of them. When the list came out showing who was in charge on what day, I wasn't on any of them. It think they didn't know where to put a Mormon chaplain. The last Mormon chaplain had asked to do his own thing, so they had given him his own room. I really thought that sounded like a bad idea. I am a protestant chaplain, and I want the other chaplains to know that we are included in the "christian" family. I asked several times to be added to the list, but they never did anything about it. I had several of my chaplain friends who had been given two assignments offer to give me one of theirs. Finally, one day when we had a field trip scheduled they didn't have a devotional scheduled so I got an opportunity. It was a great chance for us to get to know each others worship styles. We had everything from "high church" style to techno music. I learned a lot and will always remember those mornings sharing worship with these wonderful chaplains. I really gained a lot of respect for them.
The typical day in chaplains school consisted of morning devotional at 7:30 am, then class would begin at 8. Once again it was comprised of hours of powerpoint presentations that for the most part were interesting and relevant to our work as chaplains. They included such things as confidentiality, performing weddings, funerals, etc., and all the other things that chaplains need to know. There was some repeat from ODS. Unfortunately it was kind of like drinking from a fire hose. It was all good and important information, but there was so much that there was no way to retain it all. Then there was the problem of questions. We had a couple of people who loved to ask questions. It sometimes seemed like they did it just to sound smart. It made us go over time a lot. We had several presentations that we had to do. In groups we had to plan a special occasions (funeral, wedding, memorial service, etc), one presentation for a CO on some issue (mine was a enlisted sailor who wanted to become a conscientious objector), and then write a couple of prayers for special occasions (mine was the coast guard birthday).
We went on a few field trips as well. First we had a sort of spiritual retreat. We went to what looked like a summer camp and had a lot of free time to ponder and discuss spiritual things. It was really nice, but the bugs were unbearable. Later we got to go to the Coast Guard Academy and then to a submarine base in Connecticut where we got to tour a submarine. Near the end of chaplain school we went to a battle ship and stayed overnight on the USS Massachusetts. It is this giant world war 2 battleship. We slept on these cots. Mine was so squeaky that it kept myself and everyone else around me awake. I finally moved around 5 am to avoid being murdered by other chaplains. The next day, I went exploring around the town to check out all the cool old churches. Unfortunately they were all locked and nearly all closed down. When I asked about it I was told that New England is just not very religious any more.
After 5 weeks of chaplain basic training we began AMEX, the training intended to help us prepare for serving with the Marines. We were issued camo uniforms and all kinds of gear that we would use in the field. We went out to a National Guard post, set up our tents and started eating MRE's and hiking. That night I didn't sleep a wink. But the next morning we went to an obstacle course. They wouldn't let us do anything very high because they had some pretty serious injuries in previous groups, but it was still fun. That night we learned how to use night vision goggles. Then it started to rain. I had just fallen asleep in my tent and was really sleeping well when our gunnery sargean woke us up and made us get inside because of the rain and lightning. The floor was nice and hard so, of course, I slept very little. The next morning we did a leadership reaction course that was an absolute blast. We were divided into teams then given obstacles were we had to work together to solve a problem and get past the obstacle. The teachers called our group the "all star" group. Once we got it down we worked together quite well. But we definately weren't the most entertaining group to watch. One group had a leader who set up a chain of command in his four person group and required that any ideas be routed up the chain of command. He spent so long explaining the process that they ran out of time before they even did anything. Later, when he was trying to cross a water obstacle and was balancing on a plank above the water, his teamate got even by letting go of the rope supporting him, causing him to fall directly into the water.
On the way home from the LRC we encountered severe rain storms. By the time we got back to our camp, lightning was striking everywhere. The teachers decided it wasn't safe for us to stay, so we went back home for the night. I slept well. The next day we went back to camp, and cleaned up the mess caused by the rain. Then we had some classes and learned all about land navigation. Then they put us in groups, gave us maps and compasses, and sent us out to find checkpoints. This effort continued all day and into the night, all the time with rain pouring down. Then they had us paint our face and we went out on patrol. About midnight they called us in and showed us a movie about the marine corps and fed us pizza. We then got a shower and went to bed. The next morning we cleaned up and and went home. AMEX was definately my favorite portion of chaplain school.
After AMEX, we began something called TEAMS, which was kind of a waste of time. It was some skills such as PREP, which is a relationship program, and dealing with PTSD. It was good stuff, but I say it was a waste of time because they gave us all the information including powerpoints anyway. The teachers were really distracted, though, because there was a change of command that week. The most eventful thing that happened that week was the presentation I did for the other chaplains about Mormons. We did it at the church building. The bishop did the first part, then I did the end. It went pretty well, but only 9 chaplains came. I think they appreciated it and gained some respect and understanding for our church through it.
Finally the day of graduation came. It was really strange to think that I was officially a chaplain. I didn't feel ready. One of the RP's (chaplain assistant) there was LDS and had been having a hard time finding her faith in the Navy and had had a hard time with a anti-mormon chaplain she worked for. I think seeing an LDS chaplain gave her a little boost. One of my good friends who was a chaplain candidate said that he could see how much it meant to her to see an LDS chaplain. It was a very exciting time. Then, everything got turned upside down when I found out that afternoon that my orders were being changed. (to be continued)
During ODS we were mixed with doctors, lawyers, etc. But during chaplain school it was only chaplains. We had all different religious represented. There were two rabbis, a horde of evangelicals, Presbyterians, Lutherans, Anglicans, Nazarene, Pentecostals, Catholics, etc. It was great to get to mix with all of them. Every morning we had a little devotional. We were assigned days to be in charge of the devotional. Protestants did their own devotional. Catholics had theirs as well as the Jews. We were welcome to visit any of them. When the list came out showing who was in charge on what day, I wasn't on any of them. It think they didn't know where to put a Mormon chaplain. The last Mormon chaplain had asked to do his own thing, so they had given him his own room. I really thought that sounded like a bad idea. I am a protestant chaplain, and I want the other chaplains to know that we are included in the "christian" family. I asked several times to be added to the list, but they never did anything about it. I had several of my chaplain friends who had been given two assignments offer to give me one of theirs. Finally, one day when we had a field trip scheduled they didn't have a devotional scheduled so I got an opportunity. It was a great chance for us to get to know each others worship styles. We had everything from "high church" style to techno music. I learned a lot and will always remember those mornings sharing worship with these wonderful chaplains. I really gained a lot of respect for them.
The typical day in chaplains school consisted of morning devotional at 7:30 am, then class would begin at 8. Once again it was comprised of hours of powerpoint presentations that for the most part were interesting and relevant to our work as chaplains. They included such things as confidentiality, performing weddings, funerals, etc., and all the other things that chaplains need to know. There was some repeat from ODS. Unfortunately it was kind of like drinking from a fire hose. It was all good and important information, but there was so much that there was no way to retain it all. Then there was the problem of questions. We had a couple of people who loved to ask questions. It sometimes seemed like they did it just to sound smart. It made us go over time a lot. We had several presentations that we had to do. In groups we had to plan a special occasions (funeral, wedding, memorial service, etc), one presentation for a CO on some issue (mine was a enlisted sailor who wanted to become a conscientious objector), and then write a couple of prayers for special occasions (mine was the coast guard birthday).
We went on a few field trips as well. First we had a sort of spiritual retreat. We went to what looked like a summer camp and had a lot of free time to ponder and discuss spiritual things. It was really nice, but the bugs were unbearable. Later we got to go to the Coast Guard Academy and then to a submarine base in Connecticut where we got to tour a submarine. Near the end of chaplain school we went to a battle ship and stayed overnight on the USS Massachusetts. It is this giant world war 2 battleship. We slept on these cots. Mine was so squeaky that it kept myself and everyone else around me awake. I finally moved around 5 am to avoid being murdered by other chaplains. The next day, I went exploring around the town to check out all the cool old churches. Unfortunately they were all locked and nearly all closed down. When I asked about it I was told that New England is just not very religious any more.
After 5 weeks of chaplain basic training we began AMEX, the training intended to help us prepare for serving with the Marines. We were issued camo uniforms and all kinds of gear that we would use in the field. We went out to a National Guard post, set up our tents and started eating MRE's and hiking. That night I didn't sleep a wink. But the next morning we went to an obstacle course. They wouldn't let us do anything very high because they had some pretty serious injuries in previous groups, but it was still fun. That night we learned how to use night vision goggles. Then it started to rain. I had just fallen asleep in my tent and was really sleeping well when our gunnery sargean woke us up and made us get inside because of the rain and lightning. The floor was nice and hard so, of course, I slept very little. The next morning we did a leadership reaction course that was an absolute blast. We were divided into teams then given obstacles were we had to work together to solve a problem and get past the obstacle. The teachers called our group the "all star" group. Once we got it down we worked together quite well. But we definately weren't the most entertaining group to watch. One group had a leader who set up a chain of command in his four person group and required that any ideas be routed up the chain of command. He spent so long explaining the process that they ran out of time before they even did anything. Later, when he was trying to cross a water obstacle and was balancing on a plank above the water, his teamate got even by letting go of the rope supporting him, causing him to fall directly into the water.
On the way home from the LRC we encountered severe rain storms. By the time we got back to our camp, lightning was striking everywhere. The teachers decided it wasn't safe for us to stay, so we went back home for the night. I slept well. The next day we went back to camp, and cleaned up the mess caused by the rain. Then we had some classes and learned all about land navigation. Then they put us in groups, gave us maps and compasses, and sent us out to find checkpoints. This effort continued all day and into the night, all the time with rain pouring down. Then they had us paint our face and we went out on patrol. About midnight they called us in and showed us a movie about the marine corps and fed us pizza. We then got a shower and went to bed. The next morning we cleaned up and and went home. AMEX was definately my favorite portion of chaplain school.
After AMEX, we began something called TEAMS, which was kind of a waste of time. It was some skills such as PREP, which is a relationship program, and dealing with PTSD. It was good stuff, but I say it was a waste of time because they gave us all the information including powerpoints anyway. The teachers were really distracted, though, because there was a change of command that week. The most eventful thing that happened that week was the presentation I did for the other chaplains about Mormons. We did it at the church building. The bishop did the first part, then I did the end. It went pretty well, but only 9 chaplains came. I think they appreciated it and gained some respect and understanding for our church through it.
Finally the day of graduation came. It was really strange to think that I was officially a chaplain. I didn't feel ready. One of the RP's (chaplain assistant) there was LDS and had been having a hard time finding her faith in the Navy and had had a hard time with a anti-mormon chaplain she worked for. I think seeing an LDS chaplain gave her a little boost. One of my good friends who was a chaplain candidate said that he could see how much it meant to her to see an LDS chaplain. It was a very exciting time. Then, everything got turned upside down when I found out that afternoon that my orders were being changed. (to be continued)
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Naval Officer Development School- Newport RI
So I arrived in Newport in mid may to begin training. First is a five week "mini-boot camp" designed to teach officers who commission directly (doctors, lawyers, dentists, chaplains, etc.) how to be an officer in the navy. The second I walked in I felt like i was back in college in the dorms. I had a small room with a bed, closet, and desk. My roomate had the exact same thing on his side of the room. In our hall there were about 24 identical rooms, all filled with doctors, lawers, nurses, chaplains and other similar types who were there so they wouldn't enter the navy completely clueless.
Many of us had been warned that they would wake us up early the first morning to start yelling at us and making us run and do push-ups. So we decided to wake up early so we were already prepared. That night, I think they purposely turned up the heat in the building. It was extremely hot, the radiator made strange noises (I still think there is somethink living in there), and we were all apprehensive so none of us slept. But we were up at about 4 am and ready to go. Nobody showed up until about 5:30am. And even then, the day was spent dealing with administrative stuff. Waiting in lines all day on little sleep. . .that was fun. But, we made it through. Finally we went to bed, and fortunately I slept quite well. About 3:30am we heard the cheifs who would be instructing us come down the hall banging on doors and yelling all kinds of words I had never heard before but all consisted of four letters, telling us that if we weren't out of bed and ready to go in 30 seconds we would all pay. So there we were. Half asleep, confused, nervous. It was great. Then we started the push-ups. Anything we did wrong (which was everything since we knew nothing about how to behave in the Navy) was rewarded with push-ups. Anything we did right was somehow twisted by the chiefs into some reason to make us do push-ups. Though I was pretty tired, I had a good time with it. After about an hour of push-ups and flutter kicks we had learned through trial and error how to address a superior officer as well as enlisted, how to stand, and proper military bearing. After that we went down to the track for our first physical fitness test. The chiefs later bragged about how every group had improved so much from the first test to the last. All in all we really didn't exercise all that vigorously, but nobody did all that great on their first test because we were sleep deprived and exhausted from an hour of push-ups and sit-ups.
This was to be the structure of things for the first week. Wake up, exercise, come back to the barracks, shower (we had to get 140 people showered in 15 minutes, using only abou 7 showers, so we had to cram three or four people into a shower stall at once. . .just kidding). Our rooms had to be immaculate. We soon learned that you made your bed, then slept on top of it so that you wouldn't have to remake it. . .just tighten it up. The garbage can and desk were ornamental items and were never used either. Despite all our efforts our rooms would still be tossed just because the chiefs thought it was funny. Then they would yell at us and tell us to get it clean in 15 minutes.
Then there was the pit. The pit was the instrument of torture that we were threatened with constantly. We didn't actually go to the pit until after our first room inspection. But, oh was it worth the wait. The pit is like a really big sand volleyball court, but without the net. We would spread out in the sand and do our exercises. What made it even more fun was the fact that there are geese and seagulls everywhere, so the sand box looked a little more like a litter box. And here we were rolling around in it. The chiefs loved it. When else would they get a chance to make officers--especially doctors, lawyers, chaplains, etc--look like complete idiots. They worked us for a while, then right before we would leave they would make us roll in it so we would bring all the sand into our rooms, and have to clean them all over again. Our first trip to the pit was great. We ended up with one dislocated shoulder, one scratched cornea, and a strained knee. I hope it doesn't sound like it was really that bad. I am just trying to be dramatic because it makes for better reading. I actually liked it a lot. The only thing I hated was that the first time we went straight to dinner afterward, so we were dripping sweat, sand and goose turd into our food as we ate. Protein and minerals, just what we needed!
Our meals were the main thing that sustained us every day. We were not allowed to talk or watch any of the tv's that were around. We weren't allowed to eat dessert, or anything carbonated or caffeinated. It was amazing to me how difficult this was to people. Most people told me that the hardest part of ODS for them was going without coffee for the first two weeks (they let us have it after that). If any of us ever thought that things were tough for us, we simply had to look at those who were going through officer candidate school. These are the people who are competing to be chosen as officers. They are treated like garbage. They are exposed to every type of stress the Drill instructors can come up with to see how they deal with it. At meal time they looked like robots as they ate their food because everything they did had to be done in a certain way. My first time seeing them I thought they were POW's. Their heads are shaved, they are sleep deprived, so they don't look well emotionally, and most of them look like they haven't been fed much. They have to eat all their food with a spoon (just to make it more challenging) and they have a limited amount of time to eat. I gained a great respect for those guys and what they go through. It was funny at times to see what they had to do, but it was inspiring to see what these young men were willing to endure to serve their country.
It was all quite an adventure and I absolutely loved it. Things got a little easier in some ways after the first week. We got to sleep in until about 4:30am. But in other ways it was more difficult. We had to sit through hours of powerpoint lectures in a hot stuffy room and were forbidden from dozing off. We were allowed to stand in the back of the room. It was common to half half of the class standing up. After awhile standing didn't even help and I found myself praying that I wouldn't fall over and hurt or embarrass myself. I remember occasionally thinking that some of the stuff they were teaching sounded pretty interesting and that I wished I could pay attention. But those thoughts only lasted a minute or too until I lapsed back into my semi-conscious state.
Newport was beautiful. The weather was pretty nice if a little cool most of the time. I remeber one day as we were being beaten in the pit looking out over the bay and just enjoying the view. On our first weekend when we were given off-base liberty some of us rented bikes and rode all around the little island we were on. We went to a beautiful beach, rode past incredible mansions, and explored so biking trails and did some rock climbing. It made me really excited about the experiences I was having. One day I was walking by myself getting some administrative stuff done and I was just looking up at the beautiful sky enjoying the view when a flock of seagulls flew past and dive bombed me. I got plastered all over my shoulder. There is an important life lesson in that. Just when life is starting to look beautiful. . .
We did several things that were really fun for training. One day we went to a simulator that teaches you how to save a sinking ship. It is this ship that has holes and leaks all over in it. They start pumping water in and you have to get inside and fix the leaks to keep it from sinking. Sometimes I was completely underwater trying to get the holes plugged. It was a blast. Another day we went to fire fighting training. We put on all the gear including oxygen tanks and put out fires. It was interesting, but extrememly hot and uncomfortable. We also simulate abandoning a ship by jumping from a tower and swimming 200 meters, then boarding a life raft.
The first week was really the only difficult part, and even that wasn't too bad. For some people it was hard because they are pleasers. They would try so hard to do everything right so the chiefs would get after them. They would spend hours cleaning their room or shining their shoes. But the chiefs didn't really care about that. They would still tell them it wasn't good enough and make them do push-ups or yell at them. Fortunately I figured the game out pretty early on. I noticed that people who were extremely meticulous about their rooms were getting the same scores and having their rooms tossed just the same as the ones who didn't put as much time into it. On one of the first days when our chief was teaching us how to make a bed the "right way," he had to use the instruction book himself and it was clear he didn't know how to do it. When our rooms would get tossed or we would go to the pit most of us soon caught on that that was going to happen regardless of what we did. Still there were a few who would desperately try to get everybody to stress out about everything as much as they did. That was pretty annoying at first, but by the last couple of weeks, we had all gotten pretty close so things didn't seem so stressful anymore (and having a little more sleep helped too).
The best part of the experience by far was the people. I have painted the chiefs as jerks because, well, they were. That was their job. By the end, though, we all loved them. Looking back now I think it is kind of like Stockholm syndrome. After they yell at you long enough every joke they tell you seems soooo funny, and everything they say that is personal or serious seems so important. It think it is just because you are so happy that they are not yelling at you. It became like an abusive/dependent relationship. When we graduated, though we gave our chief a gift that took him by surprise a little. He liked us at the end and did a pretty good job of showing it. Well, sort of. Somehow I got conned into painting something for the chiefs in their lounge. It started by me drawing our company mascot on the whiteboard. It was a unicorn (our company name was "uniform" so our nickname was unicorn) with our chief riding on it with a drawn sword. When he saw it he said "Top, that is friggin sweet. You made me look like a homo because you put me on a unicorn, but it is friggin awesome. I want you to paint something for me." So from then on, everyday I heard, "Top, when are you going to paint our goat locker?" I did finish before I left. I will include pictures if I remember. They never said thank you, but one of them said "That is friggin amazing Top." The chiefs are always such sentimental guys.
Any time you take a bunch of grown adults who all have graduated from college, many from graduate school and have become accustomed to living on their own and put them in close quarters understressful conditions you can expect friction. Despite that, I think we got along remarkably well. Within a couple of weeks we were used to doing everything together. I made some great friends. And I actually kind of miss that closeness. It was a great experience.
Being an LDS chaplain was an interesting experience as well. One of the first things that chaplains ask each other when they first meet is "What is your denomination." I was asked that quite a bit at the beginning, often seeing sort of a funny look in their eyes when I responded that I was Mormon. I would later learn why this was. Before joining I had heard stories of prejudice faced by LDS chaplains from other Christian chaplains. I am happy to say that I never felt any of that from the people I trained with. They were all great people. I remember feeling immediately that my roomate, who was a self proclaimed presbycostal chaplain, seemed a little surprised by having a Mormon roomate. I liked him immediately and we seemed to get along great. A few days into our training he said to me, "I don't know how to say this so I'm just going to say it." That kind of statement always gets your attention. "You know that people think you're wierd, right?" I laughed pretty hard at that and said something like, "My wife tells me that all the time," even though I knew he was talking about my religion. "No, I mean Mormons." I laughed again and said that it is pretty hard to be a Mormon and not know that people think you are different. As I look back on that experience, I think that what he expected from Mormons and what he found to be the truth were a little different and he was trying to figure out why Mormons get such a bad reputation. I have a great love for my roomate, as well as many other great friends that I made during my time their. I hope I was able to be a good example for our church and change some hearts about us.
During the last week of our 5 week training we were pretty much on our own. Except for practicing for graduation we rarely saw our chiefs. I was pretty excited for Katie to come visit me and to get on to chaplain school. We had some get togethers and some skits. I got suckered into doing a chief impression, but really just made a fool of myself. But finally Katie arrived and made life wonderful. I graduated from ODS and moved to Naval Chaplain School.
Many of us had been warned that they would wake us up early the first morning to start yelling at us and making us run and do push-ups. So we decided to wake up early so we were already prepared. That night, I think they purposely turned up the heat in the building. It was extremely hot, the radiator made strange noises (I still think there is somethink living in there), and we were all apprehensive so none of us slept. But we were up at about 4 am and ready to go. Nobody showed up until about 5:30am. And even then, the day was spent dealing with administrative stuff. Waiting in lines all day on little sleep. . .that was fun. But, we made it through. Finally we went to bed, and fortunately I slept quite well. About 3:30am we heard the cheifs who would be instructing us come down the hall banging on doors and yelling all kinds of words I had never heard before but all consisted of four letters, telling us that if we weren't out of bed and ready to go in 30 seconds we would all pay. So there we were. Half asleep, confused, nervous. It was great. Then we started the push-ups. Anything we did wrong (which was everything since we knew nothing about how to behave in the Navy) was rewarded with push-ups. Anything we did right was somehow twisted by the chiefs into some reason to make us do push-ups. Though I was pretty tired, I had a good time with it. After about an hour of push-ups and flutter kicks we had learned through trial and error how to address a superior officer as well as enlisted, how to stand, and proper military bearing. After that we went down to the track for our first physical fitness test. The chiefs later bragged about how every group had improved so much from the first test to the last. All in all we really didn't exercise all that vigorously, but nobody did all that great on their first test because we were sleep deprived and exhausted from an hour of push-ups and sit-ups.
This was to be the structure of things for the first week. Wake up, exercise, come back to the barracks, shower (we had to get 140 people showered in 15 minutes, using only abou 7 showers, so we had to cram three or four people into a shower stall at once. . .just kidding). Our rooms had to be immaculate. We soon learned that you made your bed, then slept on top of it so that you wouldn't have to remake it. . .just tighten it up. The garbage can and desk were ornamental items and were never used either. Despite all our efforts our rooms would still be tossed just because the chiefs thought it was funny. Then they would yell at us and tell us to get it clean in 15 minutes.
Then there was the pit. The pit was the instrument of torture that we were threatened with constantly. We didn't actually go to the pit until after our first room inspection. But, oh was it worth the wait. The pit is like a really big sand volleyball court, but without the net. We would spread out in the sand and do our exercises. What made it even more fun was the fact that there are geese and seagulls everywhere, so the sand box looked a little more like a litter box. And here we were rolling around in it. The chiefs loved it. When else would they get a chance to make officers--especially doctors, lawyers, chaplains, etc--look like complete idiots. They worked us for a while, then right before we would leave they would make us roll in it so we would bring all the sand into our rooms, and have to clean them all over again. Our first trip to the pit was great. We ended up with one dislocated shoulder, one scratched cornea, and a strained knee. I hope it doesn't sound like it was really that bad. I am just trying to be dramatic because it makes for better reading. I actually liked it a lot. The only thing I hated was that the first time we went straight to dinner afterward, so we were dripping sweat, sand and goose turd into our food as we ate. Protein and minerals, just what we needed!
Our meals were the main thing that sustained us every day. We were not allowed to talk or watch any of the tv's that were around. We weren't allowed to eat dessert, or anything carbonated or caffeinated. It was amazing to me how difficult this was to people. Most people told me that the hardest part of ODS for them was going without coffee for the first two weeks (they let us have it after that). If any of us ever thought that things were tough for us, we simply had to look at those who were going through officer candidate school. These are the people who are competing to be chosen as officers. They are treated like garbage. They are exposed to every type of stress the Drill instructors can come up with to see how they deal with it. At meal time they looked like robots as they ate their food because everything they did had to be done in a certain way. My first time seeing them I thought they were POW's. Their heads are shaved, they are sleep deprived, so they don't look well emotionally, and most of them look like they haven't been fed much. They have to eat all their food with a spoon (just to make it more challenging) and they have a limited amount of time to eat. I gained a great respect for those guys and what they go through. It was funny at times to see what they had to do, but it was inspiring to see what these young men were willing to endure to serve their country.
It was all quite an adventure and I absolutely loved it. Things got a little easier in some ways after the first week. We got to sleep in until about 4:30am. But in other ways it was more difficult. We had to sit through hours of powerpoint lectures in a hot stuffy room and were forbidden from dozing off. We were allowed to stand in the back of the room. It was common to half half of the class standing up. After awhile standing didn't even help and I found myself praying that I wouldn't fall over and hurt or embarrass myself. I remember occasionally thinking that some of the stuff they were teaching sounded pretty interesting and that I wished I could pay attention. But those thoughts only lasted a minute or too until I lapsed back into my semi-conscious state.
Newport was beautiful. The weather was pretty nice if a little cool most of the time. I remeber one day as we were being beaten in the pit looking out over the bay and just enjoying the view. On our first weekend when we were given off-base liberty some of us rented bikes and rode all around the little island we were on. We went to a beautiful beach, rode past incredible mansions, and explored so biking trails and did some rock climbing. It made me really excited about the experiences I was having. One day I was walking by myself getting some administrative stuff done and I was just looking up at the beautiful sky enjoying the view when a flock of seagulls flew past and dive bombed me. I got plastered all over my shoulder. There is an important life lesson in that. Just when life is starting to look beautiful. . .
We did several things that were really fun for training. One day we went to a simulator that teaches you how to save a sinking ship. It is this ship that has holes and leaks all over in it. They start pumping water in and you have to get inside and fix the leaks to keep it from sinking. Sometimes I was completely underwater trying to get the holes plugged. It was a blast. Another day we went to fire fighting training. We put on all the gear including oxygen tanks and put out fires. It was interesting, but extrememly hot and uncomfortable. We also simulate abandoning a ship by jumping from a tower and swimming 200 meters, then boarding a life raft.
The first week was really the only difficult part, and even that wasn't too bad. For some people it was hard because they are pleasers. They would try so hard to do everything right so the chiefs would get after them. They would spend hours cleaning their room or shining their shoes. But the chiefs didn't really care about that. They would still tell them it wasn't good enough and make them do push-ups or yell at them. Fortunately I figured the game out pretty early on. I noticed that people who were extremely meticulous about their rooms were getting the same scores and having their rooms tossed just the same as the ones who didn't put as much time into it. On one of the first days when our chief was teaching us how to make a bed the "right way," he had to use the instruction book himself and it was clear he didn't know how to do it. When our rooms would get tossed or we would go to the pit most of us soon caught on that that was going to happen regardless of what we did. Still there were a few who would desperately try to get everybody to stress out about everything as much as they did. That was pretty annoying at first, but by the last couple of weeks, we had all gotten pretty close so things didn't seem so stressful anymore (and having a little more sleep helped too).
The best part of the experience by far was the people. I have painted the chiefs as jerks because, well, they were. That was their job. By the end, though, we all loved them. Looking back now I think it is kind of like Stockholm syndrome. After they yell at you long enough every joke they tell you seems soooo funny, and everything they say that is personal or serious seems so important. It think it is just because you are so happy that they are not yelling at you. It became like an abusive/dependent relationship. When we graduated, though we gave our chief a gift that took him by surprise a little. He liked us at the end and did a pretty good job of showing it. Well, sort of. Somehow I got conned into painting something for the chiefs in their lounge. It started by me drawing our company mascot on the whiteboard. It was a unicorn (our company name was "uniform" so our nickname was unicorn) with our chief riding on it with a drawn sword. When he saw it he said "Top, that is friggin sweet. You made me look like a homo because you put me on a unicorn, but it is friggin awesome. I want you to paint something for me." So from then on, everyday I heard, "Top, when are you going to paint our goat locker?" I did finish before I left. I will include pictures if I remember. They never said thank you, but one of them said "That is friggin amazing Top." The chiefs are always such sentimental guys.
Any time you take a bunch of grown adults who all have graduated from college, many from graduate school and have become accustomed to living on their own and put them in close quarters understressful conditions you can expect friction. Despite that, I think we got along remarkably well. Within a couple of weeks we were used to doing everything together. I made some great friends. And I actually kind of miss that closeness. It was a great experience.
Being an LDS chaplain was an interesting experience as well. One of the first things that chaplains ask each other when they first meet is "What is your denomination." I was asked that quite a bit at the beginning, often seeing sort of a funny look in their eyes when I responded that I was Mormon. I would later learn why this was. Before joining I had heard stories of prejudice faced by LDS chaplains from other Christian chaplains. I am happy to say that I never felt any of that from the people I trained with. They were all great people. I remember feeling immediately that my roomate, who was a self proclaimed presbycostal chaplain, seemed a little surprised by having a Mormon roomate. I liked him immediately and we seemed to get along great. A few days into our training he said to me, "I don't know how to say this so I'm just going to say it." That kind of statement always gets your attention. "You know that people think you're wierd, right?" I laughed pretty hard at that and said something like, "My wife tells me that all the time," even though I knew he was talking about my religion. "No, I mean Mormons." I laughed again and said that it is pretty hard to be a Mormon and not know that people think you are different. As I look back on that experience, I think that what he expected from Mormons and what he found to be the truth were a little different and he was trying to figure out why Mormons get such a bad reputation. I have a great love for my roomate, as well as many other great friends that I made during my time their. I hope I was able to be a good example for our church and change some hearts about us.
During the last week of our 5 week training we were pretty much on our own. Except for practicing for graduation we rarely saw our chiefs. I was pretty excited for Katie to come visit me and to get on to chaplain school. We had some get togethers and some skits. I got suckered into doing a chief impression, but really just made a fool of myself. But finally Katie arrived and made life wonderful. I graduated from ODS and moved to Naval Chaplain School.
Saturday, November 1, 2008
A little background
I'm not exactly a big talker. I think that my family will agree with that. When I was on my mission I didn't write home very much, to my parents chagrin. I don't call home all that often and I am often the last one in the family to hear any news. Because of that even my family is not always sure what is going on in my life. And when they do know what is going on, they may not know all the details behind it. Because of that, and because I am trying to turn over a new leaf and be a little more intentional and sentimental, I am making this blog. It may be very short, but it is still the thought that counts.
So I will backtrack a little bit to fill in some important little tidbits. In case somebody is reading this who doesn't know, I am married to the world's most adorable woman, and have three of the most adorable kids. For seven years I taught full time LDS seminary in Utah. I loved the job and the students. I can honestly say that I never dreaded going to work, and would even dread the long school vacations because I missed teaching. In 2006, however, I began having feelings that something was coming. I can't explain it very well, and some of it is too personal to try, but I started to think that maybe I wouldn't be teaching seminary for the rest of my life. I had several dreams (and it is not very common that I remember my dreams) that made me think about changing careers. I remember one day around Christmas time in 2006 walking somewhere and my mind kept trying to decide what job I would do if I didn't teach seminary. I was still very resistant to the idea, so I tried to push it out of my mind, but it was persistant. I also later had this overwhelming feeling of needing to get out of Utah. I just had this desire to have some more experiences. As feelings intensified, God made it clear that it was time for us to make the change. Katie was completely in agreement and supportive, so we took the leap of faith and put ourselves in the Lord's hands early in 2007. I still remember the day that I finalized my resignation with CES. Even though it was scary I felt so good and happy about what I was doing. Meanwhile, my sister Jessica, whose husband is a Physician's Assistant in the Army recommended that I look into becoming a Chaplain. As soon as she said it I knew that was what I was looking for. It is sort of like when you are putting together a puzzle and trying to find a certain piece. You can find lots that look like they should fit, and you may even force it in there, but when you actually find the piece that slides right in there it feels great. So immediately after she mentioned it I began the process of becoming a military chaplain.
The Department of Defense requires chaplains to have a master's degree in some sort of theology with at least 72 graduate hours. Fortunately my Masters in religious education at BYU was all but done, but for some reason, five years after beginning I still hadn't been able to finish. That turned out to be a great blessing for me because the my program consisted of only 40 hours. So because I had not yet finished my degree, I was able to go back and complete the rest of the required credits, with the appearance of all being part of the same degree (while this is not required it looks a lot better). So I immediately went back to school full time. I took classes in military ministry, and counseling psychology.
I also had to find a job that would be flexible enough that I could go to school and take care of my family. As I searched I found an add in the paper for a car salesman and Murdock Hyundai. For some crazy reason I felt really good about it. From a seminary teacher to car salesman...what a fall. It actually turned out to be an incredible blessing for my career as a chaplain. One of the things I have never been good at is going out and actively getting to know people quickly. As a salesman I had to get to know and understand people quickly and to build their trust by listening and helping. I realize that salesmen don't have the best reputation, and maybe don't always have the best motives for what they do, but the skills I have learned have been very helpful to me as a chaplain. It is amazing how the Lord has led us through this path even in seemingly small and simple ways.
Fall Semester 2007 I had the amazing opportunity to teach three sections of Book of Mormon while I was attending BYU and finishing up my required classes and my Thesis. It was a wonderful experience. I was blessed with very good classes. I was also taking 23 credits at the time. It just about killed me during finals trying to juggle everything. In fact, I got strep during the last week of finals and was unable to take several of my finals, but I still passed, and that is all that mattered.
After graduating, I began the application process to become a chaplain in the Air Force. However, when I called to contact the chaplain recruiter he said they didn't need any Mormon chaplains. I said that I would like to submit the application anyway because I felt my qualifications were pretty good. He said it didn't matter how qualified I was and that they wouldn't even accept my application because the didn't need anymore Mormon chaplains (there are currently 7, and our church is the most under-represented church besides the Catholics). So I called a navy recruiter. They literally bent over backward to make things happen. They were so excited to get LDS chaplains. There were several miracles in the process of getting all my paperwork in, but in the end I took the oath of office and went off to training in May of 2008.
So I will backtrack a little bit to fill in some important little tidbits. In case somebody is reading this who doesn't know, I am married to the world's most adorable woman, and have three of the most adorable kids. For seven years I taught full time LDS seminary in Utah. I loved the job and the students. I can honestly say that I never dreaded going to work, and would even dread the long school vacations because I missed teaching. In 2006, however, I began having feelings that something was coming. I can't explain it very well, and some of it is too personal to try, but I started to think that maybe I wouldn't be teaching seminary for the rest of my life. I had several dreams (and it is not very common that I remember my dreams) that made me think about changing careers. I remember one day around Christmas time in 2006 walking somewhere and my mind kept trying to decide what job I would do if I didn't teach seminary. I was still very resistant to the idea, so I tried to push it out of my mind, but it was persistant. I also later had this overwhelming feeling of needing to get out of Utah. I just had this desire to have some more experiences. As feelings intensified, God made it clear that it was time for us to make the change. Katie was completely in agreement and supportive, so we took the leap of faith and put ourselves in the Lord's hands early in 2007. I still remember the day that I finalized my resignation with CES. Even though it was scary I felt so good and happy about what I was doing. Meanwhile, my sister Jessica, whose husband is a Physician's Assistant in the Army recommended that I look into becoming a Chaplain. As soon as she said it I knew that was what I was looking for. It is sort of like when you are putting together a puzzle and trying to find a certain piece. You can find lots that look like they should fit, and you may even force it in there, but when you actually find the piece that slides right in there it feels great. So immediately after she mentioned it I began the process of becoming a military chaplain.
The Department of Defense requires chaplains to have a master's degree in some sort of theology with at least 72 graduate hours. Fortunately my Masters in religious education at BYU was all but done, but for some reason, five years after beginning I still hadn't been able to finish. That turned out to be a great blessing for me because the my program consisted of only 40 hours. So because I had not yet finished my degree, I was able to go back and complete the rest of the required credits, with the appearance of all being part of the same degree (while this is not required it looks a lot better). So I immediately went back to school full time. I took classes in military ministry, and counseling psychology.
I also had to find a job that would be flexible enough that I could go to school and take care of my family. As I searched I found an add in the paper for a car salesman and Murdock Hyundai. For some crazy reason I felt really good about it. From a seminary teacher to car salesman...what a fall. It actually turned out to be an incredible blessing for my career as a chaplain. One of the things I have never been good at is going out and actively getting to know people quickly. As a salesman I had to get to know and understand people quickly and to build their trust by listening and helping. I realize that salesmen don't have the best reputation, and maybe don't always have the best motives for what they do, but the skills I have learned have been very helpful to me as a chaplain. It is amazing how the Lord has led us through this path even in seemingly small and simple ways.
Fall Semester 2007 I had the amazing opportunity to teach three sections of Book of Mormon while I was attending BYU and finishing up my required classes and my Thesis. It was a wonderful experience. I was blessed with very good classes. I was also taking 23 credits at the time. It just about killed me during finals trying to juggle everything. In fact, I got strep during the last week of finals and was unable to take several of my finals, but I still passed, and that is all that mattered.
After graduating, I began the application process to become a chaplain in the Air Force. However, when I called to contact the chaplain recruiter he said they didn't need any Mormon chaplains. I said that I would like to submit the application anyway because I felt my qualifications were pretty good. He said it didn't matter how qualified I was and that they wouldn't even accept my application because the didn't need anymore Mormon chaplains (there are currently 7, and our church is the most under-represented church besides the Catholics). So I called a navy recruiter. They literally bent over backward to make things happen. They were so excited to get LDS chaplains. There were several miracles in the process of getting all my paperwork in, but in the end I took the oath of office and went off to training in May of 2008.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
